Underneath It All

This affliction haunts my life,

I’m never left alone.

My feelings control everything,

As though I’m made of stone.

I set too high of expectations,

I always let myself down.

I’m too blind to realize the truth,

Underneath this mask’s a frown.

With myself, or with another,

I’m never satisfied.

I depend too immensely on illusions,

The place of which I hide.

My life’s a thorough ruination,

One of my lesser skills’s to cope.

I allow too much to accumulate,

I rely too much on hope.

I’m completely isolated,

I’ve withdrawn myself from the world.

Clearly shown through my self worth,

One hopeless and lonely girl.

I wish I had a reason,

Something, for which, I live.

Something to look forward too,

Something I have to give.

I do wish to someday recover,

To someday be content.

But the way that things are going,